HOLIDAY PLAN

Can't wait for my sem break.Got a lot of boring stuff that i wanna do in PD.

3 WEEK HOLIDAY PLAN 

*Raya with my big happy family in Malacca

*Go to Jonker Street

*Eat sea snail

*Visit my brother in Port Klang

*Visit all my crazy n busted friends

*Go to beach alone to take people picture

*BBQ with my family
*Go to school visit my favorite teacher  

*May be to Batu Pahat

*Help with my mom's n dad's shop

*Hang with my grandparents at home

*Start a new semester 

Plan so many but don't no whether i'm going to do all of this or not.LOL =D

Today...

Today is the day that i went to low yat alone.When I went there,I saw many couple no matter what races are they.I fell jealous because of that,it has been 2 year I did't get any love besides my family.I guess that I meant not to be loved because most of the girl that I wanna know and wanna get to know her well,firstly they will talk to me nicely and slowly they will reject me like an old shirt that doesn't not wanna wear anymore.I feel so sad when I saw girls and boys holding hands together,hugs and the most important is beloved.Its hard to get a girl that understands me and its also hard to get a girl that is just like me.I really don't no how.I just wanna beloved by someone special.Girls always likes to play with my feelings.See in my life,there is no happiness,everything that i want,it won't be coming to me.Am i that bad until I became like this?am I?.Everyone keep telling me that they did't believe a guy like me which is "handsome" "Chinese looks" "cute" got no girlfriend.I keep telling them the truth by at the end still they don't believe me.I have been single for more then 2 years.Last time in school,I don't feel like this because that time I am close with my friends,but now I'm so far with them,even with my collage friend can't make this feeling go away.So what should I do about this?go back with my ex?.Some people will be asking me,"theres a lot of girls out there,why must u go back to your ex?".What they asking me is also true.But i don't no how to solve this matter in my life.Why can't i be like kak ann n khairul? haikal n ill? heidy and sean?.They are so lovely when they are together.But me?hmm I don't know what to say.hmm

I'm looking down at myself

I always tell people that don't ever look down at yourself,but now i'm the one who are looking down at myself.I just feel like crying because i just made my family and English teacher disappointed on me.I told everyone that I will get A for my English but at the end,i over confident about it and i make a huge mistake that i shouldn't do.I'm just telling myself,why can't I just be a clever boy that makes everyone smile and happy?why?am I that stupid until i make everyone disappoint?I try to become one of the clever one but I can't.I'm not good in anything even sports.I'm just a useless person that can't do anything or maybe can be categorize as spoiled brat.I'm a sad person that don't care what gonna happen to myself but I don't want to see people around me to be sad,because they are my medication.When they starts to smile,i will smile too.Thats why I always make people laugh back or bring back their smile.When I do this,I don't want anything back.I guess thats is only what I'm good in,making people happy back or being a shoulder for people that need help.I help most of my friends when they need a shoulder,I'll be there for them.I'm just helping out.I know that I'm not a type of person that always pray to Allah.I know what I'm a guy that full of sin.I don't no why I'm like this.But I always hope that Allah can forgive me for what i did.hmmm.I worry that i won't be having a good result and i'm worry about making other look down on me for what I did.Last words,I still got 1 week of final exam,I hoping that i can do well in my building conc,building met and maths.hmm.all the best for me.